The Decision

depressed girl2 001“So what did he say?” Marla asked when Jody came in.

The two 20-something roommates stared at each other a few seconds before Jody responded. “He said he would do it.”

“Just like that?” Marla asked. “No questions asked?”

“Look at me!” Jody snapped. “If you had to live my life, would you question my motives?”

Marla glanced away. “Well, you never know how the future will go.”

Jody gave a short, scoffing laugh. “Do you want to place a bet on that and hang around for years to see if it pays off?”

Marla didn’t answer right away, and didn’t look up when she answered, “It’s your life.”

“Your darn right, it is!” Jody snapped. “I’ve never been asked out –not once in my whole life! And you know I won’t be. Why shouldn’t I do it? You know it’s the only way I’ll ever have someone else in my life.”

Marla shrugged. “You don’t know that. Nobody does.”

“I do,” Jody said, “because I know that pity is the only reason you allowed me to be your roommate. And I don’t blame you! I can’t stand to look at myself, so I know no one else can stand it either!”

For several minutes the two young women remained miserably silent.

Finally, Marla asked, “So when is the insemination?”

“Next week.”

“Next week? What about school? If you do this, you’ll need an education!”

Jody didn’t seem to hear. “Then,” she said quietly, “nine months later I’ll give birth to someone I can love, and who will love me back—even though I’m repulsively ugly.”

The miserable silence returned. Somewhere in the dorm someone dropped something metal and the clang reverberated down the empty hall.

The desire to be loved frequently trumps logic.

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